If someone you know is going through chemotherapy, one of the things they may want help with is choosing a wig. Here are some tips on how you can help.
I remember when I was undergoing chemotherapy and radiation therapy for my cancer. It was back in 1990 but I remember it vividly. I am still grateful for the support and love I received from my family and friends. I see hundreds of women going through this every year and I believe it would help the process go much more smoothly if their friends and loved ones had some guide as to how they could help.
Like most good advice, these tips are not necessarily unique to wig shopping. They’re based on compassion and rationality, which are two qualities very much in demand when supporting someone battling cancer.
Do’s
- Help her to determine a budget and a “look” before you visit the salon. While this is a purchase with a lot of emotion attached to it, you are still shopping. Discuss goals.
- Be honest. If it looks like a tumbleweed wrestling a rat’s nest, then tell her. Nicely.
- Be respectful of the person styling your friend or loved one’s wig, even if you’re a hair stylist. There’s a difference in how growing hair is styled and how wigs are styled. Trying to override the wig stylist makes the process more stressful than it has to be and could result in a poorly styled wig. Try to stay in friend mode.
- Ask questions of the consultant. There are no silly inquiries. Hair is important and expensive. Your friend may not be in the mood to ask so help her out. A wig needs to do three things to be a success: It needs to have good look, a snug fit, and a comfortable feel. Help her keep these things in mind throughout the process.
- Have fun! Remember you are, in a way, shopping for a piece of clothing. Encourage her to try stuff on. Take pictures. It can be a trying time but many patients really do manage to have fun with this! The salon should indulge you to see how she looks as a redhead!
Don’ts
- Change your mind half-way through. If you only tune in to cast doubt when the wig is being styled, your friend will have to start from scratch and the whole process stops being fun very quickly. Be engaged from the beginning.
- Don’t play with your phone. Husbands, please pay attention when helping your wife. This happens only rarely, but as a husband it bothers me when I see it: Stay off your phone. Give her feedback and suggestions. This is important for her because for the next year, she knows she has to wear it, but YOU will be the one looking at it the most. And despite what she might say, she really does care what you think.
- Don’t be competitive. It does not matter that she is not choosing what you like. She appreciates your opinion, but ultimately it’s her decision, as she’s the one living with it.
- Don’t crowd the stylist. If she is having a wig “cut-in” please don’t stand next to the technician styling the wig on her. It can be an interesting process, but it’s distracting to the stylist. And distracting the person styling your friend’s wig does no one any good! Do the salon thing – sit and chat with your friend as she has her hair done.
- Don’t stress. This may be obvious but it’s not always the case. Sometimes you may have to interject and say “Let’s go have a coffee and talk about it.” That’s fine. It can be overwhelming and you are there to help her through it.
What this is really about is her privacy for the next 6 to 12 months. This is new and scary so help her by familiarizing yourself with wigs and see that she gets something that she can have confidence in while she is going through her battle. She’s counting on you.
Many of my more recent clients that are undergoing chemotherapy have told me that they have not receiving any hair loss or wig information when they are told about their treatment regimen. I find this odd because it used to be that all the hospitals would immediately give their patients lists of options and vendors to help them with their hair loss and privacy issues. However lately I have been told that at certain hospitals they have not.
This has caused some patients to scramble and be under pressure to find something suitable for them after their hair has started or has already fallen out. This makes it difficult for the patient because as a survivor I can tell you the last thing you want to do when under the effects of chemo is to go wig shopping. It also makes it difficult for the hair replacement salon because we have to guess or go by photos as to colours and styles. This is something that should at least be looked into well in advance of the treatment starting to have effect on the hair.
I have contacted people I know at Sunnybrook and have been told that they do make sure that patients are aware of these issues. I have tried to get in contact with other hospitals but I have not had anyone get back to me.
Maybe they do not know what a nice guy I am. Yet. But I hope that all centres working with patients that will suffer hair loss due to chemotherapy and radiation will give their patients some guidance.
Until then, here are some tips for you or the person you are researching for:
- Start early, but you don’t have to make a decision.
You should look around even before you start your treatment. Ask your hairstylist for some advice. Bring someone that can give you support and advice. You do not need to buy anything right away, but don’t get into analysis paralysis. Of course, if you see something that is perfect, don’t be afraid to get it. It might not be there in a week.
- Wear your hair the way you want to have it during treatment.
This way you can show the hair loss professional what you want to look like. You can change this if you like. Nothing says that you have to wear your hair the same way, and many have found that they can take advantage of trying something new. But its good to have a starting point. Also, and this is important, you might have a style or colour that does not translate well into a wig. Be prepared to compromise (a bit).
- Try stuff on.
When you think about it, what you are doing is shopping. It’s for something that you never really wanted, but if you think of it as shopping it’s a much more enjoyable experience. Try stuff on. Get back to your roots.
- Check with your insurance.
If you have coverage, find out how much. Usually it is not enough to get a really good wig, but it helps. Also, a medical wig is tax deductible. See if you would be in line for some money to come back to you. You can claim whatever isn’t covered by insurance. But you need a prescription (from your doctor, oncologist, anyone that can write script) and the insurance company will want all originals of the receipts and prescriptions. The CRA will make do with photocopies.
- Get it styled.
Any salon that you go to should style the wig for you. We insist on this and it is always included in the price of the wig. The style is part of the salon’s responsibility. You are buying a look, not a few ounces of hair.
Continental Hair will not style anything that is from another salon or purchased on line. There are reasons but that is for another blog post. The basic bit of advice for this is that you always cut it leaving it 1 cm too long (at least). Especially in the bangs. Length cannot be added to the bangs. And the wig should ALWAYS be cut on your head. Colour and perms etc don’t need to be, but any cutting needs to be done with you wearing it.
- Does it pass “The Barstool Test?”
If a bar stool is missing a leg, it’s not able to do its job. It needs all three. Just like a wig needs to have three things so it can do its job.
- Have a style you like
- Be comfortable.
- Be secure.
There are limits to these, of course. Wigs are essentially hats with hair. But it should be a look you are satisfied with, it shouldn’t be ratcheting into your skull, and it shouldn’t chase the bus when it drives by you when you are on the sidewalk.
Remember, the reason for a wig is to maintain your privacy while you are on this journey. Its nobody’s business what you are going through unless you want them to know. And one of the best things I can remember about my six months of chemo were the times when I myself was able, for short periods at a time, forget what I was going through and could enjoy moments with my family and friends. Those times were like oases in that desert of a year.
If you have any questions or comments I would appreciate hearing from you. Take care.
Michael Suba
President
Continental Hair Ltd
Toronto
mi*****@*************ir.com
I tell my clients the “hair should be fun!” And they agree, especially since none of them are having fun with their hair.
So I decided to show how someone that has no hair can still have fun with their hair!
Brittany has been a client of mine for years. She is a wonderful, beautiful young woman who has never had a salon experience. So we gave her one.
Daniel Fiorio is a fixture in the Yorkville landscape. He has been working his magic in his beautiful salon for so long that his reputation is legendary. He has worked with me before since like many stylists he will call me when a client is suffering from alopecia or is about to go through chemo. So he was excited about doing a cut and colour on Brittany’s new wig.
The virgin hair has never been processed and is permanently attached so can be cut and coloured just like growing hair. The day at the salon showcased Davide Luizza applying the system with a bonding agent. Daniel Fiorio styling and colouring, and Sara Bella doing her makeup.
At the end Brittany looked like she had fun. And we all did!
In case you missed it, a few weeks ago we had the distinct honour of having the Marilyn Denis Show come to our salon for a feature on Hair Loss and Alopecia. We were humbled and proud when Ms. Denis called Continental Hair the hair loss experts and “such a great, reputable place.”
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We have to thank our beautiful client Lucy who bared all to share her story and model different looks with their resident Hair Expert Cindy Duplantis.
Here’s the link to Marilyn Denis segment.
And yes, there are a couple commercials at the start but we promise it’s a great segment and well worth the watch! I’d also encourage you to share the segment with someone if you know they’re going through something similar. It’s a wonderful piece!
If you are a woman suffering from thinning hair this postiche (or topper) is one of my most successful designs. Continental Hair has been working and re-working this wonderful hair addition for over forty years. The two things that make it special? Beautiful hair and not too much of it. This makes sure that it gives you a natural look without being “wiggy.”
Virgin European Hair
Most hair additions or toppers use processed human hair. Its natural hair (some call it ‘remy,’ but that’s another post) but its from India or China and has been bleached and stripped and coloured. This takes away from the natural beauty and integrity of the hair. This is why we’ve always used ‘virgin’ hair. It’s the natural colour and has the cuticles (the hair’s scales) intact. All its natural beauty is there. And its also more fine than Asian hair so for many women with thinning hair it blends better with their own.
This is why it looks so good. That may be the most important reason why its so popular but it is not the only one.
Easy to apply and maintain
Many of my clients do not want to be on a program or be constantly coming back to the salon for maintenance. With some hair replacements they are attached for a month at a time at the end of which you much go back and have it re-attached. Many would like to skip this and the postiche is something that the client takes on and off herself. She can wash it herself (once a month, usually) and take care of it on her own.
There are limitations with this – you can’t wakeboard with it. And I only recommend sleeping with it on occasionally. But that is the trade off. You have the perfect look of just as much hair as you want. Perfectly natural and easy to maintain. I have clients that have worn these for decades and all over the world. It is a terrific piece of fashion engineering.
Things you should know
- The Postiche attached unsung comb clips. These attach the Postiche to your own hair so you do need some if it is going to work.
- The Postiche is custom made and usually takes 8 – 10 weeks to manufacture. It is all done by hand to suit your needs and your look.
- Prices start from $2400 and go up. The cost is determined by the hair’s length and the colour. Most will cost in the $2800 – $3200 range. Costs include the styling and fitting, but not the HST.
- A well maintained Postiche will usually last 2 to 3 years.
- We do have samples that you can try on to see what it feels like.
Here are some videos that will give you a better idea of what the Postiche can do.
If you have questions or would like to book a hassle free consultation please call the salon at 416-923-7747
Michael Suba
President
Continental Hair
Toronto
I love hair extensions. They are a great way to have fun with your hair. But they have also proven to involve a good deal of risk of damaging your hair as well. I was the first person in Toronto to do the “bonded method” of extensions in the late 80’s. And I was the first to swear off of it.
The bonded-method of applying hair extensions is where a small bunch of hair has a glue tip that is melted onto a person’s hair near the root. It can be a very nice look (although sometimes can be a bit “stringy” at the ends) but the real damage is done on removal. Its like getting 200 bits of bubble gum out of someone’s hair. And the matting that occurs above the bond is just awful.
The Last Straw
The end came when I had a lovely young woman that had just arrived from London, England. She had the bonded extensions and she asked if I would removed them. I usually would not work on someone else’s client but I am a sucker for an English accent.
She had lovely blonde hair, and I was as gentle with the removal as anyone could be. The way these are removed is that you put acetone on the bond to soften it, then crush it with pliers, then try to comb out the dreads that have matted above the bond. At the end of seven hours of doing this her hair was just a stringy mess. I was appalled. We did what we could but it just had to have time to grow out. I committed then and there that I was not going to hair extensions again. And all during the 90’s, while some salons were getting rich on this method, I stuck to my vow.
A Better Solution
There have been other methods that I have tried but it was not until I saw the tape extensions that I decided that finally there was something that looked great, was easy to apply, and did no damage to a woman’s own hair.
Like anything there are different levels of quality. I will only use the tape extensions that are made with European hair. This is not as coarse as other hair and is able to blend better with a woman’s own hair and is undetectable. They weigh next to nothing and are reusable so they are a great value. I love what they do for my clients.
I will end on a cautious note; extensions are for giving a woman longer hair. They are NOT to be used as a hair replacement system. I know that there are stylists out there that do this and it always ends up causing more stress on the woman’s hair and causing more loss. For a woman with thinning hair she should talk to a hair replacement professional about her options.
That said, hair is the ultimate accessory and should be fun. And that is what these extensions are able to give you.
Have fun with your hair 🙂
